I don't recommend books all that often. But I found this one by Elizabeth Strout to be worth recommending.It won the 2009 Pulitzer and I'll have to say, I think it deserves it. A lot of contemporary fiction bogs down and flags toward the end and this one continues strong all the way through, unfolding and enlightening as we learn more about Olive and her fellow Mainers.
The right decision was made by the author to tell Olive's story through connected short stories, rather than as a novel. Olive is a difficult, complicated person and too much of her would have been, well, too much. But she makes an appearance in each of the stories, albeit sometimes just as a thought in people's minds--as a 7th grade math teacher she has had a long-lasting influence on a lot of people. And the characters in the stories are all strong and memorable as well.
I just read a book of short stories by John Updike and I was tired, tired, tired of the sameness of the characters by the end of the book. Almost every story on its own was well done, but as a collection, it was too much the same tale told many ways. In Olive Kitteridge, the characters are varied, from different points in time, and this adds to the many dimensions of the book. She manages this even though, like Updike, all the characters are rooted in a small New England town. Her characters are fuller.
Olive is multi-dimensional and like all of us, neither completely good nor utterly bad. Although neighbors don't understand what her husband sees in her, the two do have an affection that sees them through. She is there for him to the end in a way that many other spouses would not have been.
That said, I almost gasped when I read Olive's son confront her about her inability to apologize. That's something I've struggled with in my own life, as my mother also cannot utter the words "I'm sorry." I couldn't quite believe that someone else had picked up on what a barrier this can be for someone. I think it's just one of the saddest things about mom, as I believe that ability to acknowledge when you've hurt others and then attempt to atone is at the basic core of successful relationships. Without it, you cannot be truly close to others. I've also struggled with whether to confront her about it, and have always decided not to, as at this point, I think it's unrealistic to expect her to change. (btw, I'm not completely comparing my mother and Olive as my mother is much more likeable and warm and supportive and has many positive traits. But this is an unfortunate one they share.)
We get very little hint of what childhood events shaped Olive, and she herself does not believe in therapy or that level of self-reflection. But that confrontation with her son does lead to a deepening self-awareness and a bit of growth.
Anyway, it's a lovely book and I think you should read it too and come back and discuss.
2 comments:
They should have hired you for the forward or the flyleaf, girl. You write beautifully.
Didn't see the personal application coming, but it was certainly fitting. So sorry things are that way for you. There is hardly a wall like it, is there?
Thanks, MC.
I don't want to leave the wrong impression about my mother. She has many wonderful traits to recommend her, and she did her best. She is warm, funny, thoughtful and extremely intelligent. We have many great phone conversations and visits and I enjoy having her in my life. In fact, I'd like them to consider moving closer now that they're retired.
But, that inability to acknowledge when you've hurt someone else (Is that a self-protection mechanism?) is a barrier to a deeper relationship. My mother doesn't understand why I keep part of myself walled off. But for many years I thought that I was a bad person because there was never ever any acknowledgment that any disagreement or unpleasantness could have been anything but my fault. In order to keep from feeling that way again, I have to self-protect. It's sad, but it's sadder for her because she doesn't understand what's going on.
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